Trusting those who've gone before us
Emily is spending time with her two college roomates today. One of them is pregnant and the other is getting married in November, so with all the life changes coming, they are trying to catch up a little. Not really like a last hurrah or anything, but perhaps more of a time to remember before both of them move on to these significant next stages...but that is not what I'm really thinking about.
I've been reading Don Miller's newest book To Own a Dragon, Reflections on Growing Up Without a Father over the last few days. He has a chapter in this book called The thing about choppy air which has just put me in a different place. The chapter is basically about how pilots flying routes across the US will check in with pilots ahead of them on the same flight path to see how the weather is and then they will pass on information about what sort of turbulence and stuff they are currently flying thru. I've never really considered things this way, but it really hits home with me. When i think of the men that I know, I'm really forced into the reality that most of us are out of touch with the generations of men before and after us. Don talks about it being an issue with authority and I agree as I see very clearly in myself the same stuff and I grew up with a dad. I think it is an indicator that this has become a part of our culture and I find it both confortably part of my identity and heartbreaking at the same time. Confortable when it is me and heartbreaking when it is some other guy I've come into contact with.
Maybe what seems important for me in this is the realization that I don't want to be the sort of guy that is out of touch with the rest of the world. I would like to avoid being a 40 year old teenager sitting in a coffeeshop with his giant techno phone, Five hundred dollar Italian shoes and "product" induced Fauxhawk scoffing at my parent's generation's mistakes.
I also don't want to get cynical towards the youger guys out there that seem so lacking in responsibility and drive. Don's book is a good shot of humility for me and is forcing me to be less judgemental, but it goes deeper than that. It is not enough to just tolerate. I also need to reach out in a non-condescending way to younger guys that are trying to figure things out and in the next few years try my hardest to stay in touch with what my boys are experiencing.
If you are reading this and thinking that my words aren't very profound, that is A-OK. You'd be better off reading Don's book anyway. I'll be doing just that and will fill in more as I figure it out.
I've been reading Don Miller's newest book To Own a Dragon, Reflections on Growing Up Without a Father over the last few days. He has a chapter in this book called The thing about choppy air which has just put me in a different place. The chapter is basically about how pilots flying routes across the US will check in with pilots ahead of them on the same flight path to see how the weather is and then they will pass on information about what sort of turbulence and stuff they are currently flying thru. I've never really considered things this way, but it really hits home with me. When i think of the men that I know, I'm really forced into the reality that most of us are out of touch with the generations of men before and after us. Don talks about it being an issue with authority and I agree as I see very clearly in myself the same stuff and I grew up with a dad. I think it is an indicator that this has become a part of our culture and I find it both confortably part of my identity and heartbreaking at the same time. Confortable when it is me and heartbreaking when it is some other guy I've come into contact with.
Maybe what seems important for me in this is the realization that I don't want to be the sort of guy that is out of touch with the rest of the world. I would like to avoid being a 40 year old teenager sitting in a coffeeshop with his giant techno phone, Five hundred dollar Italian shoes and "product" induced Fauxhawk scoffing at my parent's generation's mistakes.
I also don't want to get cynical towards the youger guys out there that seem so lacking in responsibility and drive. Don's book is a good shot of humility for me and is forcing me to be less judgemental, but it goes deeper than that. It is not enough to just tolerate. I also need to reach out in a non-condescending way to younger guys that are trying to figure things out and in the next few years try my hardest to stay in touch with what my boys are experiencing.
If you are reading this and thinking that my words aren't very profound, that is A-OK. You'd be better off reading Don's book anyway. I'll be doing just that and will fill in more as I figure it out.
posted by danredwing at 9/23/2006 01:53:00 PM
2 Comments:
I realy liked this part in the book too. I have stayed in touch with my grandfather and most of my beliefs on the world have been refined by his wisdom.
This summer, when doing mission in Raleigh we study Job. The book ends with a rant from Elihu in which he says "Behold, I waited for your words, and I listened for your reasoning, while you searched out what to say. Yes, I gave you my full attention, but there was no one who convinced Job, or who answered his words, among you."
The study teacher talked alot about the elderly and how they seem to reflect on thier childhood alot. He told us that we needed to be like Elihu, listening to experence and excepting to get wisdom from them.
I think this is what Don is talking about. Though it is so hard to listen to reason, jumping off a bridge is just to fun.
yeah, I agree and I love the way that my grandad tells stories about growing up without a father in southern California. It is strange, but normal I suppose that it is just now at 31 yrs old that I finally am able to appreciate his stories and his character. There is another part of the book where he mentions how John realized this true love the first time he saw his son. There is a lot of this in my grandad, the way that he has loved his family and worked so hard to provide for them and I beleive that having children is what finally made me see it.
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